I used to fall asleep imagining that I was kissing you
I would lay on my stomach under the covers
and pretend like I knew the secret
that was kissing.
I had seen it so many times
the softness of lips meeting from people in love;
It would feel like raising a flower to your face to smell the nectar
and accidentally having the petals tickle your mouth
I had seen it so many times
the awkward placement of hands that didn't even seem to matter in relation to the placement of lips that had to fit just right together
I had seen it so many times
the guilty look of having experienced something fantastic;
the glow of a kiss
I fell asleep
Secret Lover,
how do I describe it?
It's like
A million Pins and Needles pricking my skin all at the exact same time
it's like
1000 volts of lightening to my body in a rainstorm
it's like
I don't have enough blood to reach my arms and legs;tingling, they don't feel like they're apart of my body anymore.
it's like
holding my breath under water where I can hear my heart beat and feel my head get lighter
it's like
being so happy that I forget that there's any other feeling in the world.
I am a liar. It's who I am. It's what I do. What can I say? It's not like I'm going to lie and pretend I'm not a liar. I'm done with that. No, I will not lie anymore. So I'm going to tell you the truth, well, at least everything that I'm sure isn't a lie.
I've lived in DC ever since I was just a little chica. A lot of people when they hear the word DC think of the white house and official-looking white men in suits. They think of monuments and museums, the potomac, the capital, cherry blossoms. Well, that may be their DC, but that is not mine. DC is busy busy. I'm talking tons of people everywhere you look, pushing, some are sipping on their
We need to talk
and I don't know how to explain this to you
other than...
I guess you're kind of just like
my favorite t-shirt.
Like
I did everything in it
and wore it all the time
and at first I wore it
because I liked the way it made me look
but then
it was just because
it was so comforting
because I had had it for so long
but because I had done so much in it
it started to fall apart
it got holes
and stains
and I still kept wearing it
because it made me feel kind of hip
like grunge,
that was the style, right?
but then I just realized
it just looked kind of dirty
and it made me look like I just didn't care
so I threw
I never thought of you as sexy
until I watched you dribble a basketball between your legs
like it was the most undelibrate thing you've ever done
you were carrying on a conversation
and your arms were doing all the thinking for you
everything was at a rhythm
and because I couldn't bring myself to look at you
I just kept walking
but I counted the rhythm to myself
bounce..bounce....bounce..bounce....
and when it stopped
I spun on my heels
and saw that you were spinning the ball on your fingertip
and when it fell off
you didn't even notice that the world came crashing down.
I remember when I felt like I'd never be able to shut my eyes again
unless I had you right next to me
breathing with me
because if I didn't have you around
then it felt like an absence
rather than something that never was.
I remember thinking
that I could be a better person
if only I could talk to you everyday
if only I could learn everything you know
then I could be that person
the one who could love you with every part of me.
I remember the day after and feeling so empty
because I'd never see you that way again
because I knew I didn't mean much to you at all.
And what I only vaguely remember now
is how I felt when I realized
And on those warm summer days
when the grass didn't sway
because the wind didn't blow
and eveyrthing was still
except for our beatings hearts
and moving hands
I'd want to tell you that
everything was you.
And then the weather got colder
and the sky darkened to a different hue
and skin, our skin was no longer brown
and nothing looked the same as it did
against the backdrop of cloudless skies, illuminated by the rays of sun
and you told me, "I'm over you"
City girl who loves fun more than she loves funny
loves mornings more than she loves money
loves boys and never really leaves them
loves the tangible over the physical maybe the emotional, can you keep up?
All her friends say she's silly and all the others think she's just shy, she says she's just getting along but you can tell there's a fire in her eyes.
Gabby the girl who's going places
long legs and a strong body
a smartass.
She loves to intimidate
but plays it cool.
she's the realest person you'll ever meet
100% Gabby 100% of the time
and if you don't like it, then you can go somewhere else
because there's no room for you here.
She'll have your back for life.
I used to fall asleep imagining that I was kissing you
I would lay on my stomach under the covers
and pretend like I knew the secret
that was kissing.
I had seen it so many times
the softness of lips meeting from people in love;
It would feel like raising a flower to your face to smell the nectar
and accidentally having the petals tickle your mouth
I had seen it so many times
the awkward placement of hands that didn't even seem to matter in relation to the placement of lips that had to fit just right together
I had seen it so many times
the guilty look of having experienced something fantastic;
the glow of a kiss
I fell asleep
Secret Lover,
how do I describe it?
It's like
A million Pins and Needles pricking my skin all at the exact same time
it's like
1000 volts of lightening to my body in a rainstorm
it's like
I don't have enough blood to reach my arms and legs;tingling, they don't feel like they're apart of my body anymore.
it's like
holding my breath under water where I can hear my heart beat and feel my head get lighter
it's like
being so happy that I forget that there's any other feeling in the world.
I am a liar. It's who I am. It's what I do. What can I say? It's not like I'm going to lie and pretend I'm not a liar. I'm done with that. No, I will not lie anymore. So I'm going to tell you the truth, well, at least everything that I'm sure isn't a lie.
I've lived in DC ever since I was just a little chica. A lot of people when they hear the word DC think of the white house and official-looking white men in suits. They think of monuments and museums, the potomac, the capital, cherry blossoms. Well, that may be their DC, but that is not mine. DC is busy busy. I'm talking tons of people everywhere you look, pushing, some are sipping on their
We need to talk
and I don't know how to explain this to you
other than...
I guess you're kind of just like
my favorite t-shirt.
Like
I did everything in it
and wore it all the time
and at first I wore it
because I liked the way it made me look
but then
it was just because
it was so comforting
because I had had it for so long
but because I had done so much in it
it started to fall apart
it got holes
and stains
and I still kept wearing it
because it made me feel kind of hip
like grunge,
that was the style, right?
but then I just realized
it just looked kind of dirty
and it made me look like I just didn't care
so I threw
I never thought of you as sexy
until I watched you dribble a basketball between your legs
like it was the most undelibrate thing you've ever done
you were carrying on a conversation
and your arms were doing all the thinking for you
everything was at a rhythm
and because I couldn't bring myself to look at you
I just kept walking
but I counted the rhythm to myself
bounce..bounce....bounce..bounce....
and when it stopped
I spun on my heels
and saw that you were spinning the ball on your fingertip
and when it fell off
you didn't even notice that the world came crashing down.
I remember when I felt like I'd never be able to shut my eyes again
unless I had you right next to me
breathing with me
because if I didn't have you around
then it felt like an absence
rather than something that never was.
I remember thinking
that I could be a better person
if only I could talk to you everyday
if only I could learn everything you know
then I could be that person
the one who could love you with every part of me.
I remember the day after and feeling so empty
because I'd never see you that way again
because I knew I didn't mean much to you at all.
And what I only vaguely remember now
is how I felt when I realized
And on those warm summer days
when the grass didn't sway
because the wind didn't blow
and eveyrthing was still
except for our beatings hearts
and moving hands
I'd want to tell you that
everything was you.
And then the weather got colder
and the sky darkened to a different hue
and skin, our skin was no longer brown
and nothing looked the same as it did
against the backdrop of cloudless skies, illuminated by the rays of sun
and you told me, "I'm over you"
City girl who loves fun more than she loves funny
loves mornings more than she loves money
loves boys and never really leaves them
loves the tangible over the physical maybe the emotional, can you keep up?
All her friends say she's silly and all the others think she's just shy, she says she's just getting along but you can tell there's a fire in her eyes.
Gabby the girl who's going places
long legs and a strong body
a smartass.
She loves to intimidate
but plays it cool.
she's the realest person you'll ever meet
100% Gabby 100% of the time
and if you don't like it, then you can go somewhere else
because there's no room for you here.
She'll have your back for life.
The Scissors And The Needle by im-not-really-a-poet, literature
Literature
The Scissors And The Needle
The scissors and the needle play a game
The needle gently pulls the thread
And intertwines it with the two pieces of fabric
Mending them together
To look brand new
And the scissors
Take the stitches into their mouth
And rip them apart
Like they're the most delicious thing
They have ever tasted
But the needle comes back
The ever willing, but slowly tiring needle
Weaves in and out
Pulling the fabric together until
You can't tell where one ends and the other begins
But the scissors are growing bored of this everlasting game of
Building and destroying
So they take the newly woven stitches gently into their mouth
And rip once mor
I saw you being there before everyone else
I saw you waking us up
I saw you sitting on the couch with your long legs curled up underneath you
I saw you sipping coffee
I saw you starting a crackling fire
I saw you cooking dinner
I saw you laughing and smiling and "oohing" and "ahhing" at our enthusiasm
I saw you loving us and drinking in life in the best ways you could
I love Christmas
Why?
It's simple really,
Because each year, Christmas has a way of bringing you back to me
Even if only for one day
How It Came to Be by im-not-really-a-poet, literature
Literature
How It Came to Be
I sat down next to Damien.
I glanced at him as he unglanced at me.
Everyone else was filming the locker scene.
There was a long pause.
Finally I blurted out
"So are you gay?"
He giggled a bit and looked down
And said
"No. Why?"
While smiling.
I grinned
"Oh. Just wanted to see if I had a chance with you."
He looked at me
"You might just have a chance..."
And suddenly
His fingers were around my neck
And my lips were touching his
30 seconds later
They all walked in
And clapped
Because Paige had told them
Just how much I liked him
We walk.
Akwardly, at first.
But we still walk.
We've been down this road before.
But now,
this road is mature.
This is a road of responsibilities.
Begging
Turns to pleading
Turns to reality
Responsibilites.
Little responsibilites.
Run around us
flirting for us
loving for us.
I am walking on eggshells.
You are walking in sand.
My footsteps are loud and sharp.
Your's fade, as if you were never there.
ok
so it's fall right now.
sometimes it's cold sometimes it's blazing
I don't know.
I think right now it's blazing.
I haven't posted one of these in awhile
I guess because
no one really writes journals when they're happy
they may say they're happy
but they're not
because if they're happy
then they just live
and don't write it down
to try and figure out what the hell it all means.
so I've been really happy for a long time
but now
I'm just
very confused.
It's really weird to hang out with people from m and then the next day hang out with people from s. because it's just so different, I'm just like "what is this?"
hanging out
I haven't posted one of these in awhile.
so I'll just tell you what I did this week.
Monday - Movie Marathon Day. Blue Lagoon, Kill Bill vol. 2, Grace is gone.
Tuesday - Picnic and bookstore and smoothie with Gabby. A bird peed on me from the tree, though. I harrased him after that.
Wednesday - Basketball with Tara. Then a basketball game with all boys. we got our ass kicked and none of those stupid boys would pass to me other than chad or reed or whatever that guy's name was.
Thursday - I went to eat Mexican food and then hung out with francis and kevin and Cameron all day. I didn't put any sunscreen on and got kind of sunburned. But no
ok or I can stop by your house and we can exchange on the 23rd after my mom gets off of work. cuz I won't be at my mom's house until like 6 on the 23rd, so I wouldn't be able to give you yours then.